> When choosing gifts for children, we often struggle with the dazzling array of toys and items, neglecting what children truly desire.
According to international child education experts, the best gifts are often not priced on store shelves. Barbara Nordhaas, an expert at the Yale University Child Research Center, believes that gifts are not just objects, but also expressions of parental love, **a supplementary means of educating children**, and sometimes yield unexpected results.
We shouldn’t choose gifts for children based on adult preferences, but rather choose things that can create miracles and bring joy to children—gifts that children truly want.
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## Non-Material Gifts from an International Perspective
Looking at global parenting philosophies, **the gifts children need most are not limited to material things**. A survey by some Chinese experts who have worked in child education for many years found that children today want 10 kinds of gifts, none of which can be bought with money.
These necessities include parental love, respect for personal image, respect for the child, parental role modeling, principles of conduct, time for shared play, playmates, good habits, achievable goals, and laughter.
According to the German philosopher Karl Jaspers, the essence of education is “one tree shaking another tree, one cloud pushing another cloud, one soul awakening another soul.” This statement reveals the true meaning of education; it is not simply the indoctrination of knowledge. Parents setting a good example is crucial.
**The essence of education is awakening and guiding,** not shaping and controlling. Parents setting a good example often yields twice the results with half the effort. It’s not about parents being hopelessly addicted to smoking and drinking themselves, yet demanding that their children abstain from these vices.
## Gift Selection in the Context of Globalization
In the era of globalization, cultivating a child’s international perspective has become a precious gift. The Mama.cn parenting channel suggests choosing **handcrafted art pieces with an exotic flair** as gifts to help children understand the deeper meaning behind them.
They will be very proud to be “connected” with the world.
Preparing international snacks based on the featured foods from foreign films, or supporting children in learning a foreign language, are both excellent ways to broaden their international horizons.
A more international and global perspective allows parents and children to understand diverse lifestyles and explore areas beyond their daily lives.
## Educational Wisdom in Western Reward Methods
Educators in Western countries employ drastically different methods for rewarding children. Their rewards are not merely material, but rather a reflection and shaping of values.
These methods include letting children sit in the teacher’s seat to experience authority and honor, caring for the class pets to cultivate responsibility, having lunch with someone they like to enjoy the freedom to choose, and teachers calling parents to praise progress and achievements.
Reducing homework, choosing lunchtime music, using colored chalk, and allowing children to take the classroom tape recorder home overnight all allow children to enjoy special rights earned through their personal efforts.
These rewards avoid motivating children through material rewards, instead focusing on fostering a sense of responsibility, honor, collective pride, achievement, autonomy, and greater freedom, thus helping to build intrinsic motivation.
## 05 Meaningful Charitable Gifts
UNICEF Canada’s “Gifts for a Purpose” project offers another approach—transforming gifts into charitable actions. These gifts not only bring holiday joy but also make a positive difference in the lives of children around the world.
For example, the “Educating Two Girls” gift helps two girls in Uganda or Somalia gain access to education; the “School Box” contains supplies to support the continued learning of 40 children affected by the crisis.
There are also “Emergency Aid” gifts that provide life-changing nutrition, education, and emergency relief to 4,000 children facing emergencies.
These types of gifts cultivate children’s global citizenship and social responsibility, teaching them that they can make the world a better place through their actions.
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We return to Karl Jaspers’ description of education—it is like trees shaking trees, clouds pushing clouds, and souls awakening souls. When we redefine gifts as these intangible treasures, we may understand Lu Xun’s appeal in “How We Should Be Fathers”: “The primary responsibility should lie with the young.”
True gifts are not the transfer of material possessions, but rather the **mutual nourishment and fulfillment between lives**.